It’s late on the final Friday of the Fringe and a trio of comedians have been invited to compete in the coveted Edinborolympics, a test of physical and mental (oh boy, it’s definitely mental!) agility with host Mark Watson provides a running commentary that Clare Balding would have been proud of (maybe) and Adam Kay offering a musical accompaniment on the piano.
Friday night’s ‘Olympians’ were former winner Jason Byrne (Ireland), John Luke Roberts (England), and Yanni (Australia) who entered the stage before Kay delivered his own hilarious Olympic anthem to the tune of Bohemian Rhapsody.
With the crowd divided in three to back the contestants, the scene was set by Watson. Just who would come out on top after perfectly honing skills in a series of outlandish events?
First up was the Back, Sack and Crack Race where each of the three were joined on stage by willing volunteers – well, they were willing after the event was fully explained of course!). Piggy backs and crackers later, it was advantage Roberts.
Next up was the ‘Admin Heptathlon’ which involved, amongst other daftness, running into the Pleasance Courtyard and bringing back ‘a new friend’. One lad clearly needing some convincing and looked akin to a rabbit in headlights as the drama of putting a duvet inside its cover unfolded… Byrne pulls it back despite the best efforts of Yanni – who was at best, consistent in his placings.
The crowd are howling. What on earth is happening here?!
We move on to the most dangerous of events – the Soft Fruit Throw. After David O’Doherty’s infamous incident involving a grapefruit and a hospital trip for one unfortunate audience member (yup, you read that correctly), the committed audience member Rob – complete with helmet and visor – awaits his fate. It was another win for Byrne as he looked to regain his crown.
Finally, the Dick Head Dressage. No horses were harmed in the making of this event. Indeed, there were none. The task was simple. At the end of 2 minutes, the contestant wearing the most amount of clothes was the winner. Cue utter mayhem as the three ‘Edinbrolympians’ darted in and out the crowd as audience members de-robed and handed over their garments. With a boost of double points for underwear, Aussie Yanni at least got a lift when the lady in front of me placed her bra on his head – almost akin to Douglas Bader’s flying goggles.
Watson stripped the, by now very very warm, trio whilst counting their hall. Despite a valiant effort by Roberts, it was Byrne – who managed to procure a pair of ladies knickers on the way – who came out on top to secure the Gold podium spot.
The audience cheer loudly in appreciation for the crazy times they’d just witnessed. As they leave, a member of staff holds up an assortment of garments that still need to be reunited with their owner. Today’s Pleasance jumble sale starts at…
Mark Watson’s Edinborolympics is at the Pleasance Beyond
A Client Manager with an independent invoice financier firm during the day. Outside the office I volunteer as Media Manager across the Spartans FC family. Political hopeful. Broken / Retired Prop who played rugby for Scotland in his prime...
