In a forthright mea culpa Stuart Hogg, the former Scotland rugby captain, has been explaining that he entered rehab, and sought assistance from the Man Alive Project, when he was in the grip of alcohol and medication problems.
In the interview with the predominantly England orientated “The Rugby Paper” published on Sunday 33-year-old Hogg addresses issues which led to him pleading guilty to a charge under the Domestic Abuse (Scotland) Act concerning behaviour toward his estranged wife. the behaviour stretched over a five year period from April 2019.
At a subsequent sentencing he was given a non custodial sentence under a Community Payback Order with one year of supervision.
Hogg is now part of the Montpellier club in France where he is recovering from an Achilles tendon injury and he has had plenty of time to reflect, arguably for the first time publicly, in an article written by Matt Stevens.
Hogg said: “I gave up on my rugby career (in 2023 when he shocked many by pulling out of Scotland’s world cup squad in which he was expected to be a key player) to save my marriage. At the time I didn’t know who I was. I was up to my eyeballs in anti-depressants. I didn’t know what was going on in life whether I was making people happy or sad. I used alcohol to escape. I was purely existing.”
Diagnosed with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorders (ADHD) in September 2023 two weeks later, he says, his marriage broke down.
“It all happened at once. Getting that diagnosis helped me understand my behaviours and how they’d affected my life – my relationships, my mental health, everything.
“The last two years of my career were chaos. I made mistakes. I hurt people I love and I’ve apologised many times.”
Entering rehab to deal with dependency on drink and medication Hogg worked closely with Dave Miller, a representative of the Man Alive Project set up to empower men to be more conscious of their mental health
“We’ve had some really tough conversations. Every time I went on Zoom with him I’d end up in tears. I realised the damage I’d caused and I felt every emotion.”
Hogg says taking part in a long distance bike ride in aid of the Motor Neurone Disease research charity linked to the late former Scotland star Doddie Weir was seminal to seeking a fresh rugby start in France with the Montpellier club.
“I came back and told my dad, ‘I’ve made the biggest mistake of my life’. I missed the camaraderie, the laughs, the buzz. I needed that back.
“I live 20 minutes from Montpellier, five minutes from the beach. It’s relaxed. The players and coaches value me, maybe because I finally value myself. I’m in a better place mentally than I’ve been in years.”
Except that in a rugby context he has had to battle injuries including the torn achilles tendon which could keep him out of rugby until the new year.
“Mum came out and looked after me for six weeks … and I had this old person’s mobility scooter” he recalls about the start of the physical trauma.
What, among other things, has he learned?
“I used to think being selfish was a strength. But I took that too far. I hurt people, Now I’m learning to be selfless for the right reasons, for my kids, my partner, my team.
“I know I’ll never be the same Stuart Hogg I once was but I’m okay with it. I found peace. I’m living in the now.
“Everyone asks about my life after rugby. I spent too long worrying about the future. Now I just want to play until I can’t play anymore.
“Rugby will always be part of my life – 100 per cent.”
