Will Martin walked on stage in a grey suit. No smile. He has young features and quickly assured the audience that his mum was not with him
Surely, this could not be the New Zealand-born Will Martin whose first album went platinum in six weeks. The brief opening spiel over and the 41-year-old lifted the microphone to his lips.
For the next 45 minutes the audience were spellbound. Most wondered why they had never heard of Will Martin, a man who has appeared before, we were told, Prince William.
He was not scheduled to appear again, but he did, following a medical emergency, and once again, he did not disappoint. Martin was the undoubted highlight of the on-board entertainment package.
However, the in-house team of dancers, singers and the orchestra worked extremely hard to keep cruisers happy. Nothing, however, could match magnificent Martin.
The cruise overall was good, but not spectacular. Celebrity PR people use the tag-line: “Nothing closes close”. One could argue about that on the evidence of this trip.
So, what about Celebrity Millennium? It is a 91,011, 965-foot, launched in 2000 as the flagship of the Millennium-class.
Renovated in 2019, it is beginning to show its age but over 2,000 passengers were on board in 1,109 cabins, including 50 suites and AquaClass rooms with spa access.
The A1 blurb, incidentally, indicates the ship has an intimate feel and is for travellers seeking a more relaxed, boutique-style and luxurious experience. Arguable.
The company web page boasts distinctive accommodation and you can, their words, experience a culinary adventure with sumptuous dining.
Certainly, hats off to the catering staff. Their selection in the level-ten cafe was huge. Few would fail to be undernourished and the kitchen paid tribute to the countries visited.
English and American breakfast fare, for example, stood alongside freshly-made omelettes, eggs benedict – pity about the bacon here – charcuterie and fruit along with cereals. Special milks were also on offer.
Most selected the main restaurant for dinner. The service was slick and, generally, the food was quality. Specials included lobster and what we were told was American beef.
Drinks were available everywhere. You sat down and a tray-wielding waiter was there within seconds. Around 40 Singapore dollars (0.59 to the pound) secured a bottle of wine (around 12 dollars a glass) and beer was around ten dollars a bottle.
We had headed out from Singapore on an 11-day jaunt taking in hugely disappointing, for me, and much-hyped Indonesian island of Bali with stopping-off destinations in Thailand and Malaysia.
We and other cruisers we met felt it was a poorly conceived package, with two days sailing to get to Bali. Certainly, the heavy rain here did not assist the experience – then two days back. Four days chilling for some, but I became institutionalised and was reduced to reading a kids book. It as good, by the way.
The well-equipped gym with a view was busy and a cruising day included activities which included stretch, yoga and plates classes.
Other activities included uncovering the secrets of deep breathing and self-paced stretching with TaiChi and holistic approaches which may ease joint stiffness and back discomfort, along with a complimentary foot analysis to help ease back, hip and knee discomfort, but others could be deemed dubious.
I raised my eyebrows at the paper plane challenge and an officers v guests extreme bean bag toss.
We popped into a late-night karaoke session and wished we had stayed away, and opted out of origami, paracord keychain making and making mosaic coasters, but the selection of authentic luxury handbag test could prove a saviour for some.
The musical murder mystery had its moments but lacked real substance but we learned a lot from former Aussie schoolteacher Annie Smith.
Her travel information was hugely helpful and we and listened closely to the secrets of ship navigation with captain Kostas. Heavy on detail here, however, and his talk could have made more of an impact with less info.
A significant proportion of time on this cruise was spent filling in digital arrival cards for random checks on docking, with and without the assistance of on-board staff. Many cruisers grumbled and immigration officials just waved us through. Wasted red tape time.
Staff tried hard to stress hand washing rules, but some passengers still took no notice, disappointing, and we did not see the 30-minute or your possessions were removed from poolside chairs rule enforced.
Speciality restaurants are available at an extra cost, they pushed this element hard to the point of annoyance, and the handy daily planner on the ship app proved useful.
Room service is available, but a service fee of 9.95 dollars and a 20 per cent service charge is automatically added to your check.
Snip, snack and savour selections in your room include Evian water (5.5 dollars), Tito’s vodka (30), chardonnay (30), Heineken beer 10 in the state room fridge. Again, 20 per cent gratuity applies.
There is an extensive casino on-board plus an array of slot machines. We noted players from morning to noon to night, and there were art auctions and cash prize bingo.
Chilling reading a book on Deck Four did me, but others may differ.
A fellow-cruiser asked me if we would consider this cruise again. Certainly not, too much time at sea and Celebrity bosses should take a hard look at the second stop we made at Bali.
Fine if you wanted to snorkel or take a trip, but absolutely nothing to do if you wanted to stroll off the ship for a quiet wander. That was impossible because of locals offering all manner of excursions and the nearby beach did not look that inviting.
BUSY DINER: The tenth-floor restaurant packed with hungry cruisers. Picture Nigel Duncan
CALORIE COUNT: A typical sweet selection on board. Picture Nigel Duncan
